Monday, June 28, 2021

Becoming a Lifer

 You know how whenever things seem to be going absolutely terrible and then something small, but amazingly joyful happens and it takes some of the sharp away from all the bad? (Or you know, the exact opposite) 

The fortune cookie response is that how someone handles themself in these moments of extreme distress or blessing shows you just the sort of person someone is. And, I guess that’s true. I mean, it /feels/ true, at least when talking about anyone who isn’t yourself.

Two weekends ago was my best friend’s baby shower in a different state and within 50 miles of being back in town, my car decided that it was done running. Forever. 

I was at work when I found out, and I had 4 coworkers poke and yell at my car with me for almost an hour before a 5th one took me home. The next day, one of the original 4 picked me up for work, and within an hour of my workday, one of my bosses offered me her car for the weekend. 

Of course, while I had her car the tire tread ripped itself to shreds and I had to buy her a new one, but whatev. Stupid Megan luck can’t overshadow her kindness. 

The same day my boss loaned me her car, my other boss (who I refer to as my Big Boss since he could fire me if I sneezed wrong) came to me and started talking to me about a car in his possession that needs to be driven. Presented in a way like /I/ would be doing /him/ a favor by using it while I figure out my long term car plans.

Of course, this conversation happened literal hours after I signed the forms to take a loan out of my 401k so I could put some extra money down towards a new car, but that just means I’m now deciding if I’m paying it off immediately, or I dunno, paying off some bills early or maybe even buying a new kitchen table (my old one was too big so I’ve been sans table since the move). 

I interrupted myself, sorry self.

But that’s 7 people, plus the 2 others who helped me when the tire went stupid on me and I didn’t know what to do at first. Who have absolutely no reason whatsoever to do anything for me except be polite and friendly to me while we’re on the clock, who went out of their way to help me. Like, a ridiculous amount out of their way for a couple of them.

Why? When this all went down I couldn’t get my mom on the phone for a total of 5 minutes over the course of a week, and she kept leaving my text/voice messages unanswered for uncomfortable stretches of time when dealing with someone who can anxiety spiral. 

But, I guess, because of the people I work with, I was never given a chance to stress out, or give the anxiety a chance to show itself. What should have been a major obstacle has been nothing more than a blip. While the miracle vehicle has gone to the shop to get repairs I'm not at liberty to ask about, I’ve been thrown in loaner trucks from the fleet, so, with the exception of the very first night, I have had no issues getting myself and my son around. 

I still don’t understand. Lucky doesn’t begin to describe how I feel. If someone told me that losing my dream business and going to work for someone else would have led me to living a life filled to the brim with this sort of peace, I would have laughed. Hard. 

But here I am. Just over 2 years into this new, career, I guess. Naw. That’s wrong. My job title and responsibilities have morphed so much since I started, and I fully expect that to continue. And I’m gonna keep growing and morphing with it. Because when you land somewhere filled with people who give actual shits, you stay and care right back. 

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