Friday, January 25, 2013

Dreams...

I went to a seminar early this week that said blog posts should only be between 300-400 words TOTAL. So not ever happening here.. ;)


Anywho, When I was growing up, I dreamt of moving back to LA, living off Ramen and being a famous writer/photographer. In reality, I spent the majority of my senior year of HS in one of the most dysfunctional relationships known to man and I forgot to apply to any colleges. The only part of that dream that came true was the over abundance of Top Ramen in my late teens/early 20's. To this day I can't touch the stuff.

After HS, I dreamt of being THE boss of something, anything. At one point I was trying to become a Retail Store Manager for a toy company that no longer exists. I spent 5 years with them to be denied raises and promotions because I was an unmarried female and that made me too unstable to promote. I watched a good handful of men trained by me get the promotions I was seeking. (Bastards)

In massage school we were given an assignment where we were to create Vision Boards of what we want our futures to look like. I ransom note styled my dreams of a 4 day work week, college funds for any children I might have (I was barely even engaged so this was Pre-Aydan), and this amazing community center like day spa that I could still very easily spend at least an entire hour talking about.

After Monkey was born, I almost gave up. Pregnancy ran such a number on me, I was ready to just go back to running a register or being someone's over qualified secretary.

I don't know why, but one day I did start applying for jobs that I did actually want, and I ended up landing a pretty great massage job that kept me relatively happy for over a year. While I was there, I worked a few other places as well, AND on my own business again. Before Aydan I was pouring my heart and soul into someone else's dream, and I was making an average of $600/week, but I felt unfulfilled.

Now here I am. January 2013. Officially solely self employed for the 3rd year. 2 rooms, 2 other LMTs and a PT receptionist under my lead. An expansion in my building that's leading me towards managing an entire building.

And in my personal life, for the first time ever, I have a group of people in my life that I can count on for support. Not just one or two people, but an actual gaggle! The people that I can count on to be there actually shocks me. Some of the most dependable people in my life are the ones that I thought to be flaky and unreliable. I did a real disservice to myself and them to categorize them that way, but consider it lesson learned. ;)

The other big shocker to me is, somewhere along the way, I stopped trying to leave Az and go back home, and Az became my home. As much as I want to travel and see the world, I think it would break my heart a little if I actually lived somewhere else.

So. Yeah. Today's not some special day, just a random Friday where a 90 min client NC/NSed me and wasn't the last one scheduled. But that kinda makes this better. I'm not sharing this because I'm getting to eat some amazing pie or because I have a twinkly tree in my house, I'm sharing this because even though today was a pretty crazy, frantic day, I am incredibly happy to be living the life I'm living.

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